DISCIPLINE YOUR CHILDREN!

When  we are  together as a family I always take notice of how our children discipline our grandchildren.  I  came upon the book of Mr. Roy Harrison (Officially Retired CEF European Director, but still very actively involved! ) “Guidelines for the Christian family”.

He mentions  seven rules concerning discipline:  May these rules help you and your children to discipline correctly!

1.       Make the right rules for your children.  The Bible will guide you.  Make your rules according to God’s standards of right and wrong.  Making tyrannical rules for your children, is not right, but putting sensible limits on the time to be home, where they can go, and what they can do, will give your children a sense of security.

2.       Make sure your children know the reasons for your rules.   The children need to understand why they have certain “do”s” and “don”ts”. It is not simply because of an arbitrary decision on your part, it is for their own well-being and for the good of the whole family.  Sometimes teenagers resist your stand on principle.  You cannot always expect your children to appreciate your answers, but you can do what you know to be right.  The day will come when the teenager will look back on his experiences and say, “I’m glad they did it.”

3.       Keep your word.  When you tell your child to do something, or warn him against doing something, expect him to do as you say. He must learn to trust your word.  If you warn him against going or doing something and they disobey, keep your word and punish him or her.

4.       Keep in mind differences in personality.  No two children are the same.  Some need more correction than others.  Some are sensitive enough so that a word from you is sufficient in certain instances.  A boy can have different problems than a girl.  Only punish a child when he deliberately disobeys.

5.       Be consistent.  When you say, “Do not watch that programme on TV” neither should you watch it.  When you say, “You must go to bed early,” it is wrong for you to stay up late regularly (and wake up the next morning in a bad mood!) Do not ask your children to do something you would not be willing to do yourself.  Often we can be more demanding on them than we are on ourselves.

6.       Discipline in love.  Correct your child because you love him and want what is best for his life.  Are you able to pray about it when you discipline your child?  Are your motives right?  When you chastise your child, you should feel for him as if it was yourself.  He needs to understand that it is out of love you are correcting him.  He will understand to what lenghts you are willing to go for his training.

7.       Be positive, as well as negative.  Don’t just say “no” to your children.  Find positive, helpful activities to replace those that are harmful.  What can they do instead of going around with the wrond kind of friends?  Do things together as a family.  Go on outings; play games; have a family evening; invite their friends to come to your home; find hobbies that can interest them.  Most important, commend them and show appreciation for all the good things they do. 

Remember, an encouragement is like a ray of sunshine; but too many criticisms are like ice; they paralyse the child.  What your child needs to know most, as he grows up, is that you trust him.”

 

Prov. 15:10 “Stern discipline awaits him who leaves the path; he who hates correction will die”